LETTER 6 in a series of 12
TIME TO SHARE MORE LETTERS FROM:
Before I Go Berserk, Hon: Tumultuous Love Letters, Comfort Women with VD, and 4 Ton Wreckers
Kathy and Christine started a 12-part series of some of their favorite Jack Cavazzi love letters
Each week they will post a letter for their readers and fans.
This is letter six from Christine's favorites. Then Kathy will post hers.
Christine will tell you, “Jack’s letters are not your typical sweet sheets. What newlywed tells his young wife about the prostitutes across the road? The rampant venereal disease among the soldiers? Can be hot and bothered by Anne’s love in one paragraph, and in the next lace into her like a jealous,
frustrated lover? Jack Cavazzi! And, boy, does he have a way with words. This is love letter history – and an emotional romance story – that hooked me from the get-go.”
We hope you enjoy Jack’s letters and look forward to your feedback and comments.
Letter 6 in a series of 12.
Jack writes three letters to Anne dated August 9, 1953. They certainly are a roller coaster ride of emotions!
August 9, 1953
Songwhan, Korea
My Dearest Anne,
Hello Darling. Here it is Sunday again. We have the day off and boy do I need it. That party last night was a pip. I got a little high and now my stomach is all fouled up. I don’t think I am going to drink anymore. I am not used to it and it makes me sick. It’s too easy to get into trouble around here especially when you are drunk.
Well hon, I got a letter from you today. I have to admit that I didn’t like it at all. I try to be understanding and all that Anne but I am just fed up with your excuses. I told you I would not write anymore nasty letters but you asked for it so you are going to get it. This is going to be the last time I am going to tell you. I don’t care if you go out and don’t come home until 5 o’clock in the morning, I want you to sit down and write me a letter. I want you to understand that Anne, I am not kidding one single bit. I am really glad to hear that you are getting out of the house enjoying yourself hon. I want you to have a good time. But if your social life is going to interfere with your writing to me, you had better stop it right now. I want a letter every, single day – without fail. Do you understand? If you don’t like the way I talk to you, just write and say so. I won’t tell you what to do if you don’t like it. But if you don’t do what I tell you to, you can figure on being unhappy for the rest of your life.
Look Anne, I don’t blame you too much for the way you are. You were brought up good and never forced to do anything. Well you are my wife now and you are going to change. It only takes me 15 minutes to write you a letter. Do you mean to tell me that you don’t have 15 minutes a day? Well if you don’t then hire a maid! I want mail. Another thing, you said that you only average 3 letters a week from me. Are you sure Anne? I have been back from the dentist for a month now. I haven’t missed more than two days. I have written at least 40 letters this month. I have written 2 letters a day for 5 days. How do you think I feel when I don’t get any mail? Do you think I have nothing to do but sit down and write letters? I work Baby! I have very little spare time. But I write Anne. I am very disgusted. I like to sit down and write and tell you how much I love you, not to tell you to write more often. I mean what I say Anne, every word, if I don’t start getting mail from you every day I am going to stop writing at all. I don’t mean 3 or 4 letters a week from you. I mean every day. If you think I am kidding, you just try me and find out. I can love you hard and mean it but I can be lousy too. Remember that. If this letter has made you feel bad, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to write it but you forced me to. If you have only gotten 3 letters a week from me, you had better write to the post office and find out why. I can have five guys in the tent tell you if you don’t believe that I write every day. Honest hon. Writing to you comes before anything else hon. Do you want me to be like these other guys? They go out every night and get drunk and screw these whores. They write their wives about twice a week. Do you want me to become a drunk? Do you want me to go out and get syphilis or shankus or clap like these other guys? I spend my spare time laying on my bunk thinking of you or writing to you. Remember Anne, hell on earth is just a short walk from my tent. I can tell you about a guy named Smitty. His wife didn’t write him for two weeks because she was visiting her sister. Well Smitty didn’t know that. He went out and shacked up for 3 days without coming back to the company. He contracted gonorrhea, a form of V.D. He will never be able to have children. Nice huh! Besides that when he gets out of the hospital he will get court-martialed for being AWOL. In Korea that means about 6 months in the stockade. Then he will have to make that bad time up. So altogether he will be serving an extra year. It is not hard for a man to get himself in a jam over here hon. I doubt if I would get like that but I don’t like the fact that there is even a possibility.
Anne, I love you. You know that. But I don’t think you realize how much. If you let me down it would be the end for me. I wouldn’t care about anything. I sure as hell wouldn’t be the same again. Please Anne, do I have to beg you? All right I will. Anne, I beg you, Please! Please write every day. I need mail. I can’t stand this place. I can’t stand being away from you. Don’t you understand hon, I need you.
I can’t write anymore Anne. I am all screwed up. I will write again tonight.
All my Love
Jackie
August 9, 1953
Songwhan, Korea
My Dearest Anne,
Hello Darling. What again? Yes here I am again. It is time to go to bed now so this will only be a good night letter. I just want to tell you that I wish you were here and that I need you very much tonight. I am all hot and bothered and I can only be cooled down with your love. Uh huh! Only you honey can make me get that “feeling”.
I love you very much Darling. Good night Hon. Dream of me. Love me? Much? Okay! Me too! Bye!
All my Love Always
Jackie
August 9, 1953
Songwhan, Korea
My Dearest Anne,
Hello Darling. Here I am again. Are you happy to hear from me? I imagine you are a little afraid to read this letter after the one I wrote this afternoon. Don’t worry, this one won’t be as bad. I have cooled off considerably. I am still a little angry. I made a complete ass of myself this afternoon. After I wrote that letter I sort of broke down. I cried a little I guess. The guys thought I was sick or something.
Honey, I can’t stand it when I don’t hear from you. I worry, I imagine things, all of that stuff. I am not trying to be mean when I insist that you write every day hon. It’s just that I need your letters so much. I have nothing else honey. I don’t go anywhere, I don’t do anything. I just work and come back to the barracks. Maybe I think of you too much Anne. You know, I mean the more I think of you, the more I want to be with you. I just don’t know what it is hon but I’m not happy at all. Today I actually prayed that something would happen to get me home sooner but I know that there is no hope. We are definitely staying here. I won’t be home until next May. It’s so far away hon. What am I going to do without you for 9 more months? I will be a raving maniac before it comes. I know for sure I will almost be a sex maniac. These damn whores, and these guys talking about having intercourse, and thinking about being with you. It’s enough to drive anyone nuts. Just thinking of you is enough by itself. Naturally honey, every time I think of you, I think of being in bed with you. All I can say is Wow! No kidding honey, I never dreamed it would be this bad being away from you. But believe this, and remember it, I will never give myself to any of these women, Never. I don’t care how good they look or how much they tempt me. I have a wonderful wife and I belong to her, body and soul. And heart, of course. Good night Honey.
All my Love forever
Jackie